Sony is Remaking ‘The Craft’ Because the Gods Have Given Up On Mankind

Do you remember The Craft? It was part of that wave of media in the midnineties that happened when Hollywood discovered Neopagans and Wiccans were a thing but didn’t actually feel like doing any research on the subject.

So they just made stuff up.

Terrible, terrible stuff.

Well, get ready to relive that heyday of “oh god, not again” because according to THR, Sony is planning on remaking 1996’s posterfilm for Wiccans having to explain to their parents that this is not what they actually are doing with the candles and the athame.

Sorry, got a little personal there for a minute.

Leigh Janiak will direct the remake, and is cowriting the script with Phil Graziadei (who cowrote Honeymoon with her). Original The Craft producer Doug Wick is back along with Lucy Fisher producing.

No idea when they’re targeting for release, but I assume it’ll be Halloween. Which they will refer to as Samhain.

Only they’ll pronounce it wrong.

And I’ll end up banging my head against the wall.